


The Friendship Thing

by mansikka



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Fluff, Getting Together, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-22
Updated: 2019-04-22
Packaged: 2020-01-24 00:12:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18559972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mansikka/pseuds/mansikka
Summary: Michael and Alex are trying to be friends.





	The Friendship Thing

**Author's Note:**

> Here, have some revolting fluff to brighten your Monday <3

_Weeks._

It's been weeks now since they decided that they would _learn to be friends_. _Alex_ decided; Michael's just along for the ride. Because friendship has never been something he's felt for Alex. It's always been bigger, more vital, more _whole_ than that. But they had to start somewhere, had to find a way to be in each other's company without clothes coming off. Not that either of them don't _want_ that either; Michael's never been able to ignore the _need_ for him in Alex's eyes, and he's only ever kidded himself that he doesn't feel the exact same back.

 _Friendship_ also feels like such a belittling word for how they are around one another. Like when how they hug goodbye—something they have rarely let themselves have before—neither one of them is capable of letting go. Alex's fingers always find a home in his hair, and Michael's buried his face in Alex's neck so many times these past few weeks, that the very scent of him is calming. It always was anyway. But when they're wrapped around one another outside his Airstream or in front of Alex's cabin, it's all Michael can think of. Alex is _home_ to him, like no one and nothing else ever has been.

Even now, just driving up to the cabin and having it in sight is _peaceful_ for Michael. Whatever else he's been mad about since waking up this morning fades to nothing for knowing what is waiting for him inside. 

_Outside_.

Alex is already standing on the porch clutching a coffee cup in his hand as he pulls up, smiling _that_ smile Michael always lets out a sigh of relief for seeing. He doesn't even realize he's doing it but _everything_ in him settles when he sees him, jumping out his truck as quick as he can. And sure, they're working on being _friends_ and all, but he has to hug him. Michael feels Alex lean back to put his coffee cup on a windowsill behind him already with one arm around his waist, breathing him in as he pulls him in close.

"I thought maybe you'd be late," Alex says, mumbling it into his shoulder.

"I wouldn't have been even if I had stuff on." He _wouldn't_. Michael rushed through work this morning starting as the sun rose, making sure he was finished by early afternoon. And maybe spending a little time _thinking_ about what to wear for knowing what shirts Alex likes seeing him in is a new thing, but Michael _likes_ he has a reason to make a little effort. He knows he's done good for the way Alex's eyes sweep over him when he steps back, that slight heated smile that tugs on Michael's stomach and makes him want to back Alex against the nearest wall. 

Alex knows. Of course he does. His lips twitch up before he backs away, a hard swallow like he too would rather not be keeping his hands to himself. But they agreed to this, sort of, that they'd learn more about one another and take things _slowly_. Michael's not sure how much slower they can go, but he's trying.

"How about you?" he asks as he follows Alex inside.

Alex drains the last of his coffee putting the mug in the sink and walking over to the fridge for beer for them both. "It was fine. Boring, really."

"Doing what?"

"Paperwork, mainly," Alex says, leaning back against a counter. "Some inventories for stock, personnel, upcoming visits. Still. At least it's all done for this week."

"So tomorrow will be not-boring for you?"

"It'll be more interesting than checking boxes and filling in spreadsheets. So, yeah."

Michael nods, thinking that he'd happily listen to Alex complaining about his day for hours. He'd listen to him talk about _anything_. This _learning to be friends_ has made him really realize that, made him go back and replay every one of their conversations that he's secretly treasured over the years. Michael _loves_ how open and free they are now with each other. Even if this new openness really only has been a matter of weeks.

"So. What are you feeding me? Something smells amazing."

There is a crockpot on the counter behind Alex. He beckons for Michael to come over then lifts off the lid, dunking a spoon in and holding it up for him to taste. Michael opens his mouth for it, not taking his eyes from Alex's as he slides the spoon in. He pretends he's concentrating on the food, which is delicious, but really he's more interested in the flaring of Alex's eyes.

"It's chicken, mushroom, and some other stuff. Been on since about seven this morning."

"It's awesome."

"Yeah?" Alex says with a hopeful smile. Habits are still so hard to break for both of them. Michael wraps his hand around Alex's waist and draws him closer, straightening up when Alex rests a hand on his shoulder and moves closer still. 

"Yeah. It's good. Real good."

"Then, I hope you're hungry? Otherwise, I'll be eating this for days."

Michael is aware of the lid going back on the crockpot and the soft clatter of the spoon against the counter. Though Alex then turning more towards him and cradling his cheek makes it hard to really think of anything else. _This_ has become a part of this _friendship_ thing they're trying; Michael's not too convinced any mere friendship would feel like _this_.

"I can help you with that," he says, resting his other hand on Alex's hip.

"I missed you."

"It's been _two days_ ," Michael says in teasing even if his heart is soaring in triumph. This _friendship_ thing is harder every time they see each other; but when Alex comes out with things like _this_ it's an agony that they're still apart. But the good kind of agony. Michael can console himself only for knowing Alex is worth the wait, that what they'll eventually have is something special, like not everyone is as lucky to have in their lives.

"Still," Alex says, smiling at him. What is Michael supposed to do with that? 

"Same."

Alex smiles at that, closing his eyes as he sighs out in what Michael thinks is relief. And he waits for it, the slight pinched smile that comes just before Alex reminds himself of why they are _waiting_ , why it is that he needs to pull back. But it doesn't come. Alex instead drops his forehead against Michael's and cups his face between his hands, stepping closer still.

"You like this with all your friends, Alex?" Michael blurts out, because sometimes he's still an idiot with these kinds of things. Especially when he's feeling out of his depth. He _wants_ Alex, he wants to _reach_ for Alex, and it's torture that he has to hold himself back from doing just that.

"No," Alex says, shaking his head against Michael's. Michael is sure he can feel him smile. "Only with the friends who are also my family. Only with the friends that are… only _you_."

How is he supposed to not react to that? Michael's restraint over these past few weeks has been tested like nothing else. But he holds back, again, because Alex asked it of him. He can't let it pass completely, however. 

"You're making this really hard. You know that, right?" Michael says, their lips brushing together. 

Their sweet moment passes for Alex dropping his head, his shoulders beginning to shake with mirth. Michael sighs in exasperation and nudges his head against Alex's, already grinning when Alex looks up. Alex eyes are wide in delight, his face split into the most beautiful smile. Michael _loves_ when he's free like this, and silly. He playfully slaps Alex's on the back of the head which only results in them hugging again, and okay, this, in the name of _friendship_ , is something Michael really likes.

"Sorry." Alex pulls back from him, reaching for two bowls on the dish rack.

"It's fine. Mock me when I'm trying to be serious for once."

Alex snorts with laughter and nudges him further along the counter. "I'm _really_ sorry."

"Yeah, right—"

Alex's kiss to his cheek is unexpected, and Michael's automatic reaction is to turn his head for more. Which Alex knows for the proud little smile on his face when he dishes up. "You want to eat at the table or through there?"

Michael likes Alex's cabin. There have been a couple of times when he's almost fallen asleep on the couch for how comfortable it is. So he nods behind them as he watches Alex spoon the chicken dish into their bowls, resting his hand on Alex's lower back. "In there."

"You want to… find us something to watch?"

"Maybe some music?" 

"Whatever you think," Alex says, turning to smile at him. And since this evening they are already being more affectionate than ever, Michael drops a kiss on his shoulder, snatching up Alex's beer to take through with his own before waiting for his reaction.

As Michael sits on the couch he pulls Alex's laptop closer on the coffee table. He pauses to look around the cabin and is struck by the feeling of home. He knows it's because it's Alex's space, and that really it's Alex that makes him feel like this. But there are touches of Alex everywhere he looks. Sitting here alone waiting for Alex to come through is almost like another opportunity for Michael to learn even more about him.

"I liked that playlist you made," Alex says as he joins him, balancing their bowls on trays. "I haven't stopped listening to it."

It's hardly a mixtape, but Michael still feels a little pride that Alex would like the music he suggested for him. And since it's the thing still playing on the laptop from before he arrived Michael only turns the volume up a little, carefully balancing the tray Alex slides into his lap.

"This looks amazing. Thank you."

"Your turn next time," Alex says already tucking in.

"Here?"

"Wherever you want."

"So if I said, I wanted us to go out for dinner. Maybe grab a burger or something in town. Would that count?"

"Of course it wouldn't," Alex replies, avoiding his eyes but so obviously smiling. "It's not the same as slaving over a crockpot throwing things in at half six in the morning."

"If you want me to put a crockpot together at six in the morning, I'd expect to stay the night before."

Alex looks at him and shrugs, his mouth full. Michael decides he is purposefully being a menace and scoops up another spoonful.

"I'd say yes to dinner out though," Alex adds as he eats, once more avoiding his eyes.

Michael's spoon scrapes against his bowl for his surprise. "You would?"

"I would."

"You wouldn't be ashamed to be seen me, with this whole _friends thing_ we've got going on?"

Alex's eyes flare wide as he stops eating altogether. "Michael. I wouldn't be ashamed of being seen with you anywhere—for whatever reason."

He has been, though, Michael is painfully aware of that. So he continues to eat and pleads with those reminders to leave him alone.

"I'm sorry about every time I made you feel like that."

Michael argues with his appetite against it disappearing, stubbornly staring at his bowl. "It's okay."

"No. It isn't. It never was."

Michael has to look up for that, catching the sorrowful guilt on Alex's face. He wants to _comfort_ him for it, and that feels so out of place with the ache in his heart for remembering the times Alex has pulled away from him.

"I could say it was all residual. That what—that what happened when my _dad_ caught us together that time made me act like that, but that… that wouldn't be fair to you. I mean, that's part of it," Alex says, frowning to himself. "But I need you to know that… most of that was nothing to do with _you_ at all. It was all me. Me not… me being selfish, and an idiot, and… I'm sorry, Michael. If I could go back and change all of that, I would. Every time."

This is one of the harder parts of this new _friendship_. They agreed to be open and honest with each other like they haven't so many times in the past. It's both hard to hear and hard to respond to, but for Alex, Michael knows that he can.

"I can't pretend that it didn't hurt like hell," he says, forcing himself to keep looking at Alex. "But I… I get it."

"I wish you didn't have to _get it_. I wish I'd never made you feel like that."

"Well. Come have a burger with me sometime this week, and I'll forget all about it," Michael says, meaning it and pleading with Alex not to find an excuse for why he can't.

"Burger and pool. I might even let you _win_ ," Alex says, smiling at him and once again settling the rage that so often creeps into Michael's heart.

" _Let_ me?"

Alex shrugs, going back to his dinner, smiling around his spoon. 

They talk about other things, Michael sharing some news of Isobel and Max, and Alex talking more about his day. All these simple conversations they have now come so easily to them both. Alex might have accused them both of not talking that much in the past but Michael remembers so many quiet moments like this one tonight. Perhaps stilted, perhaps only in the moments when they caught their breath before reaching for one another again, but still. They have _talked_ so much in their lives.

When they are full they both slide further down on the couch, Michael stacking up their bowls onto their trays and pushing them on to the coffee table. "I'll wash."

"You don't need to."

"You cooked."

"It's fine. Sit," Alex says, reaching across the slight gap between them and squeezing Michael's thigh. Michael stares at his hand, waiting for Alex to pull away, but he doesn't. So Michael covers his hand with his own and slots his fingers through.

"Five minutes," he says, dropping his head back on the couch and smiling.

"At least fifteen."

Michael turns his head to the side to find Alex mirroring him, and nods back. 

"I got dessert," Alex says, stroking his thumb over the back of Michael's.

"Oh?"

Alex smiles, looking away. "Remember that night we sat out in your truck, in the middle of nowhere, under that stupid blanket that… I can't believe that's all you had to sleep under."

"How many times did you use _me_ as a blanket?"

Alex drops his head, nodding. "Once or twice."

"And which time?" Michael asks. They never had as much time together as he would have liked, so no one could blame him for cataloging every shared moment. But if Michael is honest he could spend the rest of his life with Alex and it still wouldn't be enough. He'd like to try anyway. He's hoping that's where they're headed.

"When we went to that bakery. Down by the—"

"That cherry pie?" Michael asks, sure he can still taste it even after all these years. He's probably still got the shirt he spilled half the filling down somewhere in the Airstream. There are so many memories of _Alex_ tucked away there.

"The very same," Alex agrees. "I think it's the same people still. Looked the same to me, anyway."

"Sweet."

"You want some now?"

"What happened to these _fifteen minutes_ you were making me wait before clearing up?"

Alex shrugs, squeezing Michael's fingers between his own. He rolls his shoulder until he's close enough to drop his head down on Michael's, and Michael can't stop himself turning just enough to get a kiss to the top of his head. And aside from the music playing on Alex's laptop the room is silent; Michael feels at _peace_ for it. He focuses on the warmth of Alex pressed into his side, and the soft grip of his hand.

Though Alex isn't making it easy for him. He keeps shifting, just a little, just enough until his face is almost pressed into his neck. It would be the simplest thing for Michael to turn his head just enough to kiss him. He knows if he did they wouldn't be able to stop. Alex's breath keeps ghosting over his throat, and Michael knows Alex is sharing exactly what he is thinking. He doesn't _want_ to keep waiting, but if it's what Alex needs then he'll keep fighting his need for Alex. Though maybe he can't resist getting a kiss to his forehead. It's torture when he looks up.

Alex's gaze falls to his lips, his own parting before Michael sees a flash of tongue. He watches Alex swallow in discomfort and tries to argue with his stomach that it isn't knotting in anticipation. He could close this gap between them, stop this flighty feeling he keeps having when they're together like this. He knows Alex feels it too, can see the way he is also fighting to hold back. Michael is both relieved and disappointed when Alex sighs and drops his forehead on to his shoulder, still holding on to his hand.

"I should do those dishes," Michael says, mumbling it into Alex's hair. Alex shakes his head and drops his grip, instead reaching to tuck his fingers around Michael's side. Michael strokes down his arm before resting his hand just above his elbow, happy to hold on to Alex just as long as he wants him to.

"Do you have much work tomorrow?"

"Got a couple cars scheduled in the afternoon. Maybe two more sometime in the morning. Not too much."

"But enough?" Alex asks looking up, his face filled with concern. 

Michael rolls his eyes and kisses him on the forehead without thinking, freezing until he sees Alex smile for it. "I have enough."

Alex worries about _everything_ to do with Michael. He worries that he doesn't have enough work, about him sleeping in the Airstream parked up, about his constant _squabbles_ with Max. Michael's life is about as far from perfect as it's about to get but work and money aren't an issue, and he's always felt secure in the Airstream. As for Max, he and Michael will and have always fought; it would be strange if they didn't.

Alex nods like he wants to believe him but is still worried. Michael fights to kiss the look off his face. 

"Honestly."

"You'd tell me if… things weren't okay though. With anything. Right?"

Michael sweeps his hand back up Alex's arm and cups his face. "Since we're all about _talking_ these days. Of course."

"It's better though. That we're talking?" Alex asks, beginning to play with Michael's shirt buttons. 

It's enough to catch the words in Michael's throat. "Of course it is."

"I want you to feel like you can talk to me about anything."

"I want you to do the same."

Alex smiles in answer, back to repeatedly darting his gaze over Michael's mouth. "You're the first person I think of when I need to tell anybody anything. You always have been. I just… _didn't_ , until now."

"Same for me," Michael admits, and here they are again, so close but still separate, so in need for one another but still keeping apart.

"Good. It's important to me to know you don't feel like… that you _know_ you can talk to me. About anything."

Michael smiles, and because he doesn't really trust himself too much, nuzzles against Alex's cheek and quickly stands up. "I'm gonna wash these dishes before I get too comfortable not to."

Of course, Alex follows him to the kitchen, and of course that need is just as prevalent here as it was on the couch. Michael tries to make small talk, find stories to tell Alex about his week he doesn't already know, all to keep his mouth busy, and his thoughts focused. Even the dishwashing doesn't take Michael nearly as long as he wants it to, finding himself wringing the dish towel over and over in his hands when it's done.

"It's getting really hard to not kiss you."

Michael's stomach knots hard for Alex's words. He leans back against a counter because he fears the strength of his knees, and that dish towel gets rolled up in his frantic attempt to keep busy until it's wrapped around his knuckles in a tight twist.

"Yeah," he blasts out, his voice cracking. "It is. But we agreed—"

"I think you were right about the idea of us being _friends_ being a hard one," Alex adds, coming to stand in front of him. "I _want_ us to be friends. But I want us to be everything. Not only that."

There is a lump in Michael's throat. He doesn't trust himself to talk so just keeps tightening that towel between his hands, until Alex reaches out to cover his hand telling him to stop.

"These last few weeks, us getting to know each other better. It's been _great_. But it made me realize that… we didn't really need to, at all. I already _know_ you, Michael."

"It's the same. I feel like that. The same," Michael says, cursing his words for the ungainly way they come out. 

Alex squeezes his hand, gently tugging the towel from his fingers and throwing it on the counter to Michael's side. He slots his fingers through Michael's to squeeze then drops his hand, swallowing hard as he closes the gap between them.

Michael holds his breath as Alex leans his hands either side of him. His own hands tremble when he raises them to hold on to his waist. Alex keeps _staring_ at him, and the panic it's putting in Michael's heart is beginning to get uncomfortable.

"I _love_ you, Michael," Alex says softly. "I always have. Through every fight, and all the time we never spent together, and every single time I walked away. I couldn't _not_ come back."

"Me too," Michael says, hating how badly he is shaking. Reacting like this is _stupid_ ; this is _Alex_. This is Alex saying everything he wants to hear. "I mean, I love you too, Alex. I… I do. I always did."

"Then. Maybe all this _waiting_ is… maybe we don't need to be waiting anymore. Maybe we waited long enough," Alex adds, pressing against Michael then standing back. Giving him both the space to breathe and the time to think, to make the decision about what happens next.

Michael pushes away from the counter, cradling Alex's face in his hands. He swallows hard, staring back intending to savor this moment, then closes the gap between them and learns the taste of Alex all over again.

***

Neither of them can get close enough. Their chests are flush together, Alec's fingers through Michael's hair as Michael continues to cradle his face, but it's still too far apart. Though for once with them, this isn't about _sex_ , or losing themselves in one another. If anything it is _finding_ themselves, allowing themselves to be whole. 

Michael is still trembling. Every time they pause for breath is the moment he thinks his knees will give up on him, but somehow they're still standing. Here, in the middle of Alex's kitchen, clinging to one another like they might never be able to part again. Alex looks just as torn between crying and splitting his face with his smile as Michael is feeling. Michael would think on that for a little longer, but is far more desperate to once again claim his mouth.

It is only when Michael feels Alex adjust his feet and stumble that he pauses long enough to be able to think.

"You okay?" He asks, dropping his hand to Alex's thigh like that might be any help. 

"I'm good. I just… feel like maybe my knees might give out on me."

"Oh." Michael laughs in relief and squeezes Alex's waist. "You and me both."

Alex takes his hand and tilts his head back towards the living room, leading him over to the couch. They stumble as they sit, tugging one another closer so Alex is half-sprawled over Michael's lap. 

"Okay?" Michael asks again as he carefully squeezes over the top of Alex's prosthetic. Alex nods, sweeping his hand up Michael's chest before cupping his face and drawing him back into a kiss.

Michael gets his hands beneath Alex's shirt, sweeping them over his back. Alex shuffles closer, curling his arm behind Michael's head, fingers back through his hair like they always are. 

"I don't think I could have let you leave here tonight without doing this," Alex whispers against his mouth, nudging his upper lip against Michael's.

"And here was me trying to be all _gentleman_ -like when you had all these intentions for me."

Alex smiles at his teasing and Michael knows a new lightness in his heart. "You always were pretty chivalrous."

" _Me_?" Michael has no idea where Alex has got that idea from. He probably shouldn't be preening for praise he's probably not earned.

"That sweater you gave me when you picked me up when I stayed late at school for music practice."

Michael smiles for the memory, gently pinching Alex's earlobe between his thumb and finger wondering how he'd look with an earring in today. "Okay. So that's _once_ —"

"That first time I came back from Baghdad and you put… blankets out in the back of your truck for us. And you covered me in them when I fell asleep."

"Just didn't want you to get cold." Michael drops his forehead against Alex's before ducking to nuzzle against his cheek. One day he'll tell Alex all of his memories of every time he came back to Roswell, how much it killed him to watch him leave each time. And Michael knows when he shares those memories Alex will share more of his own, that they'll be even stronger for it. He _knows_ Alex is where his home his in this moment more than he ever has before. More than he's ever allowed himself to.

"How could I get cold falling asleep with you?" Alex asks, pressing his hand against Michael's chest, swirling his thumb between his shirt buttons. 

"Well—"

"But it's not just that," Alex adds, kissing Michael's thumb when he sweeps it over his lip. "It's so many things."

"You—"

"You hold doors open. You clear up after people. You make sure people get home okay if it's late. And you really _listen_. You _care_."

"Caring's not chivalrous," Michael replies, though if he's honest he will bask a little in this image of himself through Alex's eyes. He doesn't get to feel good about himself too often.

"It is the way you do it," Alex argues, "at least, it is with _me_."

Michael _wants_ to be different with Alex. He thinks he already is, but these few weeks making this little bit of effort to be with him feel _good_ to Michael in ways he can't really define. And if it gets him called things like _chivalrous_ , there is no way not to love that. So he kisses Alex again, because now they've started all he can think of is how much more he wants.

"Only with you."

Alex's smile is triumphant. He climbs into Michael's lap crossing his forearms behind his head, kissing him slowly, like he intends to take all night. Michael sweeps his hands up his thighs tucking his fingers back beneath Alex's shirt. He mirrors the smile he feels against his lips and closes his eyes, concentrating on the feel of Alex.

Without intending to they end up sprawled out on the couch, with Alex on his back. Michael reaches down to adjust Alex's leg so it's tucked over the back of his calf, his fingers creeping beneath his shirt once again. Alex slots his hands into Michael's jean pockets letting out a soft sigh when Michael begins to mouth over his neck and throat. Michael presses his nose just beneath his ear and inhales before kissing there, smiling for the way Alex turns his head inviting more.

"Will you stay?" Alex whispers, turning back and staring into his eyes. 

"If you want me to," Michael says in relief; how was he supposed to convince himself to go?

"I always want you to."

"Then I will."

Alex smiles, raising his head for another kiss. "Maybe there's bacon and eggs in the fridge."

"You cooking me breakfast?"

"I will."

"You… planned on keeping me here tonight all along?" Michael asks, warmth flooding through his chest for the thought of it. 

"I hoped," Alex says with a soft shrug and then is kissing him again. Alex is right; right now there is no need for them to talk. 

They have never taken the time to be like this. Their kisses are unhurried, and though the need they feel for each other is making them slowly rock together, there is a sense of patience and peace between them that Michael really likes. He knows when they go to bed things might be different, but until then everything about their time together here is soft. He wants to bathe in Alex, savor every second since they've taken so long to get where they are. 

It is Alex that brings their kisses to a stop, arching up beneath Michael and pressing a firmer kiss to his cheek. "Sorry. I need the bathroom."

Michael kisses his neck again then moves sitting back on his haunches, holding his hands out to help Alex up. When Alex stands he cups Michael's face and ducks to kiss him, seeming reluctant to leave even though he's only going to another room. In his absence Michael realizes the playlist they'd put on hours earlier has finished, so reaches out to start it again.

He plays with his lips, smiling for the feel of Alex still there, deciding to kick off his boots since he is now staying the night. He takes his socks off too, flexing his toes against the wood of the floor. He looks up to find Alex watching him, and when he beckons, stands. 

"I promised you pie," Alex says when he reaches him, grabbing him at the waist.

"You did."

"You want some?"

"Absolutely."

Michael takes Alex's hand when it's offered and follows him through to the kitchen, laughing when Alex grapples him and gets him up on to a counter. He pulls Alex between his thighs for another kiss, curling his fingers over his shoulders and smiling for the softness of Alex resting his hands on his legs. Alex noses against his cheek and pulls away. Michael watches him take a pie from a grease-spotted paper bag and approach him with it balanced on his palm, snagging a fork from the draining rack as he passes.

"You gonna feed me it here?" Michael asks, watching Alex slide the fork through the crust. He obediently opens his mouth when Alex raises it, the familiar taste of cherry bursting on his tongue. "Just like I remember."

"Yeah?"

"Try some," Michael insists, pulling the fork from Alex's fingers and feeding him some.

"It's good."

"Maybe the setting isn't the same," Michael adds, pressing his feet against the counter door.

"The important stuff is," Alex replies, once again taking the fork.

They eat the pie in minutes, their kisses that follow sticky and cherry flavored. Alex wets a dish towel and takes Michael's hands to wipe clean, before slotting back between his thighs. 

"You know. Iz's got this event thing she's looking for numbers for. People."

"What kind of thing?"

"Honestly? I have no idea," Michael says, resting his forearms on Alex's shoulders. "But she's promising free food and drink. You think you maybe want to come with?"

Michael's heart thuds for fearing Alex will dismiss the idea immediately. Alex's eyes lights up, and his face breaks out into a smile.

"Really?"

"Of course."

"You want me there with you?" Alex asks, like he is in awe of the idea.

Michael cradles his face against his palm ducking to kiss him. "Of course. We're… you're important to me, Alex. You're—you're my family too."

Alex's kiss feels like a reward. Michael could get used to this. 

*** 

Michael knows with full certainty that this, here with Alex, is where he will feel at home for the rest of his life. 

It isn't the way they're moving together in Alex's bed, Michael's legs wrapped high around Alex's waist. And it's not for the interruption of their kisses for both of them looking down between them for the sight of them sliding together. It's because Alex's skin against his is Michael's shelter, and Alex's kisses fill Michael with a peaceful warmth. It's because Alex's eyes have always been the place Michael has found himself in when everything else was lost around him. And because there is no person or place other than here where Michael has felt as loved.

" _I love you_ ," he whispers as they get their breath back, Alex's face buried in his neck. It feels _safe_ to admit it, exciting to be able to say those words so freely and out loud. There is a kiss to his throat, and a smile he feels against his jaw before Alex looks at him.

"I love _you_ ," Alex tells him, his smile filled with all of that love. Michael raises his head to kiss him then drops it back against the pillow, sleepy and sated and so _settled_ like he never has felt before. 

"Look at us. In a _real bed_ for once."

"Hey. I like your place too," Alex says, nosing against his cheek. 

"Still," Michael says, sweeping his hands over Alex's back as he drops his legs back to the bed. "This is good. I like it here."

"Then, you'll just have to stay over here more often."

"I'll need a toothbrush and everything."

"I'll clear you some closet space," Alec says as though this next step between them will be the easiest thing in the world. And it will be, Michael decides, he's determined. They have put each other through so much hell in the time they've known one another. They both deserve some _easy_ , some _happy_ now.

Michael rolls Alex over on to his back pressing a kiss to his cheek, kneeling up and squeezing his thigh. When he stands Alex holds out his hand for him to squeeze; Michael bends to kiss the back of it, smiling at Alex as he turns it to kiss over his knuckles. Michael leaves to use the bathroom, dampening a towel so that when he crawls back on to the bed when he returns he can wipe them both clean. He leans on his side propping his head up on his arm as Alex moves to mirror him, settled once again for the heat of Alex's hand splayed wide on his hip. 

They trade kisses, still talking about everything and nothing in hushed voices; Michael feels like they might have done this a hundred times. He falls asleep in the curve of Alex's arm, hearing a whispered _I love you_ just as he dozes off. Michael knows he can expect good dreams tonight.


End file.
